I Cry

JBPZ-004All my cares in the love aspect of my life I have always left in God’s hands. Most times it felt like a lifetime of endless waiting. But I held on to what I know to be true deep within me. That God has His eyes on me, that He not only knows what is best but that He truly desires to give it to me – just patiently waiting for me to ready my heart to receive it.

It was only when I said “I do” at the altar that I felt, for the first time, I was really truly prepared to receive His best. I finally had a comprehension of God’s love that made unquestionable sense to me. That His giving of Himself and His all is meant to be received willingly and freely.

All my cares in the love aspect of my life I have always left in God’s hands. Then during our wedding dance I felt God gifted it back to me. It appeared that He took the flawed human love I gave Him, perfected it, and gave it back to me. I recognized His fingerprints all over it. At that instant, although I never could fully fathom it, I felt the greatness of His love for me and I realized I am too little to contain it all – it overflowed. I cried with so much joy. God delivers on His promises. He was right there holding our embrace. He showed-off and showed-up. I cried.

I used to wonder what I would do when I’m finally face to face with God in heaven. I used to believe I would instantly run to His embrace. Now I don’t think that. Now I know that even though my spirit doesn’t have tear glands, somehow, I will cry.

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