Before the ‘how’ gets answered the ‘what’ has to be established first. What is moving on? Does it have to do with the passage of time? Time has no freedom. It has no option but to go one second per second and one day per day. Time will never be on my side, it cannot choose to be because it is not free to be. Those that do not have freedom also do not have a choice.
Time has always puzzled me. From school I learned that time is calculated based on the planet earth’s rotation on its axis as it revolves around the sun. That means only earthly things are bound by earthly time. Out there in the universe the time I am well accustomed to does not apply. Science states that anything born will die. The sun was born just as the earth is which means that eventually they both will die. Then earthly time as I know it, stops. Time will not go on forever.
So could I really move on or is it time that passes me by? Is it me within the present that creeps up on events that are still in the future, like moving on to view one painting after the other in a row on a gallery wall? Or is time being carried to a backwards flow? It could be that time carries the future and present events back away into the past. If that is the case, then I do not move on, time just goes by. Time just happens to me. But if it is me within the present that advances into the future and leaves that past behind, then I can truly move on. But which is which?
Time is not, but I am free, therefore I have a choice. Could it be that the choice is left to me? To stay still and let time go by or to advance forward leaving the present by pushing it to become the past… in whichever case, all wounds will still heal.
If time is not on my side, can timing be? The way I understand it is timing is dependent on the mover of events. Time to me then seems to be just a tool in the hands of the Master of Perfect Timing. Therefore timing could be on my side only IF the Master is. So, is He?
Love needs to be in the equation, and the answer will always be personal just as my stand on the debate on the “existence of forever”. In order to get the answer right I must first ask the right question. It’s not whether or not it exists; it’s that whether or not forever is even possible to begin with.
Is ‘forever’ time-bound? If time began it will also end. If forever is bound to a time that ends then it is not possible. Forever is impossible in time. If forever is not time-bound how can it then be possessed by something that is limited by time like myself? I was born and I will die. I do not have forever which means I cannot give it. Therefore if I promise my human loved one a forever then I put myself in a position where I will over-promise and under-deliver, and always (ALWAYS!) disappoint. I cannot give anyone forever.
Forever is not something I give, it is something I receive. And there is only one who can give it; He who has no beginning and no end. Forever is possible with an eternal God. Two mortals in love is not each other’s forever. That’s why the Sacrament of Matrimony did not make me promise the forever I cannot give. It only asked for “till death do us part”, not forever, but only “for as long as we both shall live”; making the sacrament not only sacred and holy but also very possible. Forever is possible too, but only from the eternal God who can give it. And the beauty of it all is that I could love a God who is more in love with me. God is my forever.
So, moving on for me does not mean leaving the past behind; but leaving it all – the past, the present, and the future – in the hands of the God of perfect timing. It means not asking God ‘when?’ but letting Him know ‘whenever you’re ready my God’ is what I choose to want.’ It means choosing to level up, from my will to God’s. Forever is not meant for here and now, but it is for me; which means I am meant to be where my forever and ever awaits me.